Big In Japan - Life Lessons Living Abroad
Its nearly been 1 year since I arrived at Narita International Airport and the woman that arrived then is very different to the one I am now. I'm not sure anyone could of really prepared me for my new chapter in Japan. To be honest, I am not sure how I survived - but I did and the best part, I am a stronger, more resilient, wiser human who has been blessed with some amazing rich life experiences since living in the land of the rising sun.
I can't say I always thought that, arriving here alone with nothing but my life packed into 3 suitcases (clothing and some photies of the peeps I love most and of course my main man, Pilot, my dog) plus navigating my way to my nights accommodation after a 28 hour travel time, was well to be honest - challenging. If you had told me a while back that I would be divorced, living in Tokyo (alone) and Donald Trump would be the president of the USA - I swear I would of asked what bush you were smoking. But life always has other plans and only when we look back do we understand why things unfold like they do.
So well I could go on about the amazing food, awesome culture, beautiful cities, stunning countryside, those snow monkeys and well my incredible love for most things Japanese - I will rather share something to remind you of the things we often sometimes forget but have become so evidently important to me since my time here:
1) Manners maketh the man
Perhaps manners may or may not be a country or a culture thing, but more a person thing but in Japan manners are a very real part of everyday life, it revolves around elevating the status of others while humbling oneself, a concept I think we sometimes have either lost or loose on busy or bad days. I always prided myself in being a polite person, but until you experience Japan - you realize there is always room for improvement. I have mastered the art of "please"and "thank you" (not just cause they probably the only two words I can say without google translate) but also because it feels good and well the world really is a better place when we all respect each other.
2) The value of your tribe
When you are far away, and the time difference can sometimes be a bitch, you really realize the importance of those close to you. Physical touch is a real thing peeps and only now do I understand why they offer "free hugs" at Shibuya Crossing. So where am I going with this - love your tribe - hard. Old and New - every person that is in your life is a blessing and the ones that aren't - walk away. Life really is to short to hold onto relationships that are not nurturing, growing, loving or kind.
3) Don't Sweat the Small Stuff
It really is small stuff. I used to sweat about being stuck in traffic, problems at work, missed runs, ques, rude people, other people's opinions (always a big one) and well the list really can go on. But being here with a language challenge, surviving depression and figuring shit out for yourself reminds you really where to give your "%^* s". You are what you feed your energy on! So stop the madness (cause lets be honest, it will drive you mad) and focus on the stuff that really matters - to you anyway.
4) Its all just stuff
Moving from a beautiful home on the beach to a very, very, did I say very small apartment and well yeah arriving with a couple of your things - really makes you realize all the materialistic things don't matter. Hard to imagine I know, I thought the same. But when you realize that spending money on experiences will for sure make you a richer person - the bigger house, bigger car and bigger TV set - wont impact your life - not in the long run anyway. Been there done that and got the T'shirt and there is something enriching about knowing you are more than that - your stuff! So while having nice stuff is always great, spend it where it means the most - sharing special moments with loved ones, developing yourself and creating meaningful experiences - I promise you - you will feel so much richer and really who cares what the Jones are doing anyway.
5) Rome was not built in a day
Oh yes, I always used to say it was, if I was the architect. I expected to be fluent in Japanese and well adapted to my new world ...yesterday - cause why, cause that is what successful people do - or so I thought. But things take time and patience really is a virtue. Allow yourself to adapt and adjust to new environments, situations and or recovery from loss (whatever that may be) - in your own way and in your own time. As long as you are doing one thing every day that moves you towards your goals, dreams, recovery, whatever - I promise you - you can't ask more than that.
Tokyo living really has been a wild ride so far, one that I will forever be grateful for, because living in a very foreign country has taught me so much about life and myself - every single day. So when the days are challenging (because there always will be some of those), I remind myself of the amazing opportunity I have been afforded and to keeping grabbing it by both hands. Using this experience ensures I keep growing wiser, kinder and more open and receptive to what life has to teach me. So if you ever make your way this side - please do give me a shout, I am always thirsty and well there really is great whisky here - just saying!
